sick :(

SICK!!

Madness, started having slight headache after school on friday. Thought it was still quite okay, and given that I don't see doc. yea. lols. Woke up yesterday with headache and throat hurt like mad! Walk a few steps and have to stop cos feel like vomiting :/ sucks ttm. then still went over to darling's place cos alr say hao liao. yea. instead of bussing, since I wasn't feeling well, I cabbed :/ anyway cab fare was cheaper than usual. so okay luh. lols.

then darling took care of me!! hee (: thanks! :D don't :( alr!! i'm better. will be okay soon. had fever, 37.9. after sleeping dropped to 37.5 and after a while dropped to 37.0 till now. yupp, just hope it doesn't go back up. throat still hurts!!! sucks ttm. swallow saliva also pain. eye kinda hurts a bit as well. sucks to be sick man!! it's been a while since I was sick. why must it come at this time!!! worst cramps this time as well. why does this month suck so bad...

GET WELL SOON!

Stop falling sick darling!!! anyway, I've decided to change to tumblr, BUT!!! in the midst of signing up for a tumblr account, APPARENTLY THEIR SERVER IS FULL AND I CAN'T ENTER. what good service, they should totally improve on that. LOL! (:

tumblr seems cool

TUMBLR.

I feel like changing to tumblr. Should I should I?? Haha.. anyway, meeting darling later for buffet or some sort. Been meeting up a bit too much luh... but yea. HAHA.

Wild wild wet & escape

Went to wild wild wet and escape with darling today. It was supposed to be a happy day, but I spoilt it for him. Sorry, I'm exploding easily nowadays.


It's okay. Maybe I should learn to get back my previous temper where a volcano will just be forced to become extinct. No more.. Everything shall be kept in a safe box where no one else knows. So I'll just stop making people around me unhappy. Can someone invent some vanishing powder? Because it may just be useful for some people...

finally over

EXAMS ARE FINALLY OVER!!, for now...

whether or not I'll make it, leave it for later. let's just not spoil my alr very unstable mood now (:
I'm just gonna have fun all I can before I've to face the consequences :/

oh well, I'm not in the best of mood to blog, BYE!

pissed off

PISSED OFF

i'm losing my freedom because of shitty results that are being produced? now my sis is doing well studying something she's interested in, and i'm here "studying dead books". i don't know.... i'm vexed, frustrated... pissed off, whatever. totally in no mood. didn't continue studying chem, gonna fail tmr?

is being honest bad? i was just being honest and frustration came about. "你以为很好听啊？" retaining isn't something good, but... nvm what's said has been said. whatever harm has been done. it's not a reversable reaction. i'm handling something harder and tougher now, is it being fair to me? you think i'm not stressed? i didn't intend to come into a JC, but i did. I don't know... i think i no longer feel happiness. what fuck is this society doing to people?
i'm tired. i need to vent out everything...

haiz... screw life.
tired of everything.. seriously, I GIVE UP.

number 5

Mambo Number Five


Happy 5th month darling! ^^ Here's your long awaited blog post. Jiayou for promos!! 3 more papers left (: then we go on movie spree again okay? hee. the last movie we watched was ages ago! :D can't wait for thur after 11am! and and fri you sure champion again not? lols :P


my hiccup is finally gone!! I think I'm going to sleep soon. Good Night! (:

post exam

EXAMS PLEASE END

i can't wait for post-exam activities man!!! PLAY LIKE MAD before torture starts again. HOPEFULLY i can be promoted *cross fingers* of course crossing fingers doesn't work. but then again, i'm absorbing faster now. i just need to dedicate my time to my studies. for this period of time. 2 weeks!! or less, very short. i hope i can clear, i really hope so. pass with you!!! (:

although it really seems interesting, and i really want the feeling of my taiwan trip back, i won't go. ouch.

anyway, other than all that shits!!! I'M REALLY LOOKING FORWARD TO AFTER EXAMS.
there's quite a cool enrichment, SAND ART!!! WHOOO!!! haha finally get to get in touch with it!!! (: provided i get my choice? heh. i hope i do get it!!! not sure if it's the same one as i'm aiming for, but in any case it should be similar. if i don't get into that, then i'll be somewhere going one of the hip hops bah. and and, i wanna go to the beach again!!! the breeze, the peace (other than the noise pollution). or like, universal studios!! [which i promised to go with you, after promos okay!] and like, shopping/window shopping?? hahah any one of which is fine!!! :D just let me have a breather. and and, most importantly the factor of exercise!!! badminton is fine. it's been a while since i've played it. netball/badminton for IHG, i can only go for one and netball it is. HAHA (:
yay yay!!! i'm looking forward to end of promos. LIKE SUPER LOOKING FORWARD!!!!

this post is going to be bloody long.. cos i suddenly feel like blogging. HAHA! i've been slacking luh, i shouldn't be blogging but studying :/ oops. okay going to soon... like SOON! it's been 4 months, ups and downs. feeling lost, getting back. a range of feelings. heh. oh wells, i guess it's just this way.. recently it's been worse? stress cos of promos? things will get better. de-stress whichever way!! just don't let one day go to waste alright? (:
Elton Sim Cheng Hui! HEH. you said my blog post isn't about you, it will be soon!! like one whole post. I haven't had the mood to blog, you know why. random note: Mdm Chan is super kaypo :/ oops!! hahahaha. anyway, I LOVE YOU! :D

does my blog post finally look bright and colourful?

bleeding inside

it struck me finally. those words hit hard... very hard.

why're you so fucked up?

BITCH

why the fuck are you freaking like that? does it make a difference if I go out with someone else? you don't even know what's happening right. freaking fucked up. you can go out all day till dawn and I don't even do that but you complain I'm going out everyday. I'M FUCKING STUDYING. what're you doing? your fucking leisure activities till after 3am and u're still not home. fucking hell, do you fucking know what you're doing? must you just shout at me when u're fucking unhappy with something and haven't even gotten the facts right? what's your fucking problem? u do whatever you want and want NO ONE to fucking control you... then why must you fucking spoil my mood and shout and me for whatever fucking reasons you have?! I have my promo papers coming up.. maybe you should just fucking shut up before I've no fucking mood to study and screw my papers up. When I don't get promoted, you'll have your fucking reasons to put the blame on something I know YOU WILL. so fucking hell, stop your fucking annoying actions. I've enough of your shit, and some others have had enough too. u're just plain annoying, learn to control how you speak before you get your fucking facts right. THANK YOU VERY MUCH!

sorry for the super vulgar post... just freaking pissed off.

HAIZ

Seriously Hate Exams. ZZZ

I don't treat you like an idiot.. I never did... haiz.

why...

Do you really have to tell me all that? Isn't that not supposed to be what people of my age is suppose to worry about?
Is it really necessary??? haiz. as if i've nothing else to worry about. life sucks.

argh fuck it

DAMMIT IF YOU THINK IT'S SO EASY, YOU DO IT.

argh. life sucks sometimes. choose to ignore but it never succeeds because YOU have to keep saying and saying for whatever reason that pleases you. what do you want me to do?! It doesn't work if I do this and it also doesn't work if I do that. WHAT THE HELL CAN I DO THEN?! why do I have to be stuck in this kind of shit?! I alr chose to keep quiet because it's what I should endure if I chose it. BUT YOU ARE MAKING IT WORSE. do you understand what i'm going through? NO. then why do you have to comment on every single thing I do?! so what if I get irritated and pissed off and helpless if I hear them? There's absolutely NOTHING I can do about it. because which ever way I choose and whatever way I do, IT WILL BE WRONG.

Chose to suffer in silence and take it as nothing has happened. You had to drag in every single thing you feel like talking about. TOO LONG!! WAY TOO LONG. Didn't even want to blog it out but it's the only way I can vent it. DID YOU EVEN KNOW ABOUT IT IN THE EARLIER STAGES THEN? NO. SO WHY ARE YOU COMMENTING SO MUCH? IT'S TORTUROUS. NVM... I DESERVE IT LUH. Will continue to suffer in silence... swallow whatever shit you have for me. There's nothing I can say anyway. Disappointment.. you think I want? NO. what can I do about it? NOTHING.

AND TO SOME OTHERS: IT'S NOT EVEN YOUR PROBLEM. WHY DO YOU EVEN HAVE TO OPEN YOUR FREAKING MOUTH AND COMMENT? DOES IT SERVE ANY PLEASURE TO YOU? BECAUSE IF YOU DIDN'T KNOW, YOU'RE JUST ADDING OIL TO THE FLAME. AND IF YOU DON'T REALISE, LET ME TELL YOU. IT'S NOT GONNA HELP ME IN ANY WAY... IT'S JUST GOING TO HELP YOU GAIN SOME PLEASURE.

I'm beginning to lose the patience in me. Getting frustrated easily etc etc. FML. one more thing, if you could really shut up about it, it'll be best. If not, maybe you should consider talking less about it if you don't even know what's going on. Now everything seems to be on me, whatever. Take it as that. It doesn't matter anymore. Just a matter of time. Not what it seems to be.

sick zzz

RIGHT OR WRONG?

Was falling sick on thur... officially fell sick on fri. Nose was so freaking tired, ran like from thur night and its still running on and off. Coughing a little.. but nvm luh. heh. Didn't go for council... no photo taking for me. Anyway I looked very sick (according to Ling Yuan), so nvm luh. Take photo will look even worse than when i'm not sick. lols.

Promos are in a month's time =/ Need to start serious studying alr!! I'm so freaking screwed... dammit. Haven't started to revised.. can't seem to focus. for some reason. Haiz, whatever luh. Many priorities have to be put in place, many things to worry about. TOTALLY NEED MORE THAN 24 HOURS A DAY, DEFINITELY NOT ENOUGH. Too demanding?
Still learning to gulp everything down. Shouldn't explode soon. I don't know what I should do :( Standing alone? I've absolutely no clue.

"SORRY" no longer means anything.

it doesn't matter anymore. too many times.
caring is no longer something good.